PUBLICITY AGAIN

Publicity for Thanksgiving weekend open studios in Greater Point Reyes Station continues to be an issue. If you’re one of the 22 artists participating, you have high hopes for big turnouts and many sales. In fact, for many of us, this is the big market event of the year. So you’re puzzled why you can’t get the same media attention as the current war. I know, that’s unreasonable, but you can understand our frustration and why we created four new dynamite committees to solve the problem.

Of the lot, the parade committee, has proven the most active and imaginative. It recently announced the schedule.

The procession , with marching bands, floats, troops of flag and streamer twirlers, drum majors and drum majorettes, the mounted Sheriff’s Auxiliary, a fleet of antique cars, a hundred voice choir, the Petaluma Kennel Club’s Trained Dogs and Obedience Classes of 2003 and 2004, a mystery entry from the San Mateo Clown and Juggler’s Institute and an Indian female elephant, will begin under the first of several street banners in Olema. Escorted by 250 slow moving motorcycles, the marchers will proceed to Point Reyes Station where the dogs will put on a special performance, and the choir will sing a capella “God Bless America” while distributing open studio brochures to one another in a symbolic gesture of the season.

Then the parade will wend its way to Inverness for the grand finale. Because this event will necessitate the closing of both Highway One and Sir Francis Drake Boulevard for most of Thanksgiving Day, it is bound to get media attention, not to mention the attention of a few irate motorists. But the finale will over-shadow everything. Upon reaching the last street banner in Inverness, the slow-moving motorcycles will erupt with thunderous blasts, and leaving the elephant, bands, dogs, equestrians, twirlers and other astonished creatures in their dust, will speed to Drakes Beach where they will plunge like lemmings into the sea.

No one can accuse your Parade Committee of being asleep at the switch. By the way, you must talk this up if you want good coverage.

The Pyrotechnic Committee has also been on its toes. It has picked Love Field where the fireworks will begin at 7:30 p.m., Friday, Nov. 26. Bring your automatic weapon if you want to make a personal contribution to this spectacular.

The Sacrifice Committee has had to deal with disappointment. The original assignment was to kill an ox at 11 a.m. to open the marketing for each day of the three day event. First, it seems that no one on the committee could remember how this ritual should be performed and even their friends shrugged in ignorance. Hard to believe, isn’t it? Then it was found that three oxen would put the committee well over budget. So after much soul-searching, the members have suggested that we settle for a little bull.

The fourth committee, sad to say, literally never got off the ground. For some reason, when the Navy saw the reports of the other committees, it cancelled the fly over by the Blue Angels.

It’s sad, but if this year’s open studios is not a success, we’ll at least know whom to blame.

(Since this was written there have been aplications for next year's parade from the Vallejo Bagpipers, The Tulsa Polka Accordianists and the Hollywood Cleavage Club. All the world loves a parade.)

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  ¶ 1:36 PM

  POK-E-MAN

Come and sit and tell me tales.
Describe, perhaps, the life of snails.
List me your wishes bye and bye
With golden castles in the sky.
Do you have a special friend
Who’ll stick with you until the end?
So let’s recount our recent dreams
Where nothing stays the way it seems.
Or tell how you turned out to be
The image of a younger me.
Mute with only me to blame
For giving you that silly game.
11/9/04  ¶ 8:43 AM